Fading Colours
by Broken Bracelet
Summary: You don't know what you've got until it's gone. Oneshot.


**A/N: Squee! Okay, I decided to come back with a new... something..., even though the chances of me being able to finish this within a short matter of time are... very very unlikely. :P It could be a one-shot, it could be a fic. It depends on whether or not I like the way it ends. Even though it is, yes, summer. So uh... whatever. Oh, in case you're wondering how I got the idea for it, I was watching CNN today and they were talking about Natalee Holloway and the Boy Scout who got lost, and I just... it really touched me for some reason. So I got inspired. Hence, "Fading Colours".**

**I'm not sure when I want this to take place. It's really just AU, not really having any kind of relation to the books and the events that happen in them.**

**Hmm... so, I published this yesterday (6/20), took it off today (6/21), then decided forget it, I'll put it back up. So... yeah. If you've already read this, umm... well, it's 'cause I put it back up. P**

**EOTCAME OUT TODAY! dance**

* * *

I sat in silence, my entire body aching with cold, staring at the TV. Why was I watching the news? Why? This was stupid. Not even worth it.

Except I couldn't turn it off.

I hadn't known I'd cared this much.

But she was seven. Seven years old. Only seven, and yet, gone.

I missed her.

"_A seven-year-old girl reported missing three days ago has still not been found... the girl was lost in a shopping mall in Trenton, New Jersey, seperated from her mother, stepfather, and older sister... the parents have not been reached for comment."_

My first reaction was shock. How could this happen? How _does _this happen? Mary Alice wasn't always the brightest star in the sky, but she wasn't moronic. She knew not to wander off by herself. Safety in numbers.

Then I was confused. Why hadn't someone told me? Who just lets this kind of information go? As if it was unimportant, not necessary to daily life. Why do you have to find out that your seven-year-old niece is gone – just gone, as if she'd fallen off the face of the earth – from your television?

I needed something. Chocolate. No, not chocolate. I didn't need material items. I needed someone. Someone who could understand, maybe, what I was going through, or even if they didn't understand, someone who would listen anyway. Someone who cared.

I couldn't think of anyone who'd want to listen. If I called my mom, or Valerie, they'd be upset enough anyway.

Ooh, Valerie. I needed to call Val. I needed to make sure she was okay, make sure she hadn't done something remotely stupid. Which she had a tendency to do.

But how do I just approach the topic? "Val, I heard, and I'm _so _sorry. I was watching the news and they had a story about it, that's how I found out. Yeah. Not because you called or had someone else call and tell me. Because I was watching the effing news. I had some anchorwoman tell me, as opposed to you, my own sister. Isn't that just _grand_?"

Things get way too crazy way too fast.

* * *

"They haven't found her, Steph," Val whispered. I'd decided to call her and try not to be angry at anyone for not telling me. Val didn't sound like she'd been crying, but she sounded – hurt beyond words. As if someone had just ripped a part of her out. I couldn't imagine what it would be like. "They haven't found her. They have everyone looking for her. _Everyone_. Just like that, she's gone. Angie was talking to me, I turned around... and she's gone. Just gone."

I gripped the phone so hard my knuckles turned white and stared out my window. Just gone. "She can't have just disappeared," I said, barely believing the words myself. "She's out there, somewhere. She's not just gone."

Val sobbed. This was killing her. I couldn't even imagine the pain, the hurt, that came along with losing your child. "It's my fault," she said. She was talking in a hoarse whisper, barely enough for me to hear her, and I didn't know why. "All my fault. If I had been paying attention... it's my fault. I lost her."

I argued with her about this for quite awhile... you didn't lose her, it's not your fault, it's no one's fault except the person that took her.

But I couldn't stop staring at the TV. It was on just about every channel, every news station anywhere was covering the search for the missing girl. Three days. That's a long time for anyone to be gone, much less a seven-year-old.

I shuddered as they showed her school picture... the same one I had framed in my living room. God, I had no idea how much that little girl meant to me. Guess you never really know what you have until you don't have it anymore.

Val and I sat in silence, and I didn't know if she was still on the line, when she spoke up again. "Have you talked to your boyfriend?" she asked. No matter how broken up Morelli and I are, she still calls him my boyfriend. I'm not sure why. Maybe she, as well as my mother, just _really _wants me to get married. "I don't know if he handles this type of thing but... maybe he's heard something? Maybe they have some leads they're just not telling us?"

Ooh. That was actually a good idea. Not that the police would keep anything from the mother of the missing child, but maybe they just hadn't gotten around to it. Maybe they were holding off until they learned something more.

Maybe I didn't really want to know.

* * *

"I haven't heard _anything_ except what you've seen on TV," he offered. I had barged into his house, not even bothering to knock, mostly because I was upset, but also partly because I was curious. And he hadn't called to offer his condolences or make sure I was okay. The jerk. "Seriously. I'm not even involved."

I sighed and shook my head. "But you must know _something_."

He looked exhausted and focused his attention on the floor, then looked back up at me, eyes pinched with concern. "I know you're worried. But there's nothing you can do right now. Trust me, we're taking care of it. Just think positive. She'll be fine."

"It's been three days. A lot can happen in three days."

He didn't bother to argue with me.

* * *

Ranger, Connie, Lula, Mary Lou... everyone was sympathetic. It wasn't even as if she was _my _daughter, but they were sympathetic anyway. And they hadn't even known how much she meant to me. If I hadn't known, they sure as hell hadn't known.

Another day passed without information. And another day. And another day. And another day.

And I was tired of waiting, tired of the difficulty of never knowing. Every so often, Val would call, saying the police had gotten a lead and that they were investigating it, questioning people, arresting people, everything. But it all turned into dead ends and there was never any sign that they had made any progress at all.

I hated it when the phone rang, hated it when someone knocked. I didn't want to know anymore. Didn't want to care.

I wanted it to be all over.

* * *

Sometimes I have a fear of the unknown. I'm not so much afraid of the future, just afraid of what the future holds. I'm afraid that one day, I'll wake up and everything will just be gone and over and done with and there's nothing anyone can do to stop that.

I was sitting with Ranger, in my apartment, not saying anything, just enjoying the company. He'd called to ask and see if I needed a job, sensed the pain in my voice and decided to come over. He'd brought food but we weren't eating, and I had a feeling he was probably getting bored.

"I'm sorry I'm not entertaining," I said, quietly. "You can turn the TV on, if you want."

He shook his head. "Nah, it's okay. Come here." He gave me a hug. I looked at him, thinking he wasn't a very huggy person, but that it was nice anyway. Very nice. "Look, they're gonna find her. It's just taking longer than usual because... well, just because."

It was a lame excuse, but I did appreciate the attempt.

He hugged me again, this time slower and sadder, making me realize just what was important. It wasn't how you dealt with problems, whether you chose to acknowledge or ignore them. It was the people who were with you during them, who didn't tell you what to do but were still there for you because you needed a shoulder to cry on. Or someone to hug.

The phone rang, and I heard a sharp intake of breath. Ranger had actually gotten scared. Hah. If the circumstances weren't so miserable, I would've laughed. Maybe if it was good news, I'd choose to laugh later.

"Hello?"

"Steph...?" It was Morelli. "They found her. Um, they just called Val, and..."

I interrupted him, not really caring about what came next. "They found her!"

"Yeah. They did."

They found her.

**A/N: So this was incredibly God-awful, weak, not to mention sappy. Blahh. It ended how it ended because I'm tired, and I was sick of writing such a hideous piece. But this is just exercise for me. If you want to review, you can, but focus on the good things. If you can find any... :P**


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